The Bahamas
The Reluctant Adventures of Captain Hastings the Boat Dog
Hoffman's Blue Hole Adventure
February 26, 2017: Hastings's Log: Hoffman's Cay, Berry Islands
Are you ready for an adventure? My humans ask. Ugh, No. These adventures are always terrible ideas and involve suffering and stupidity. They never bring snacks, but love to thrust tepid water in my face instead of jerky. Nope, "adventure" is not for me.
Are you ready for an adventure? My humans ask. Ugh, No. These adventures are always terrible ideas and involve suffering and stupidity. They never bring snacks, but love to thrust tepid water in my face instead of jerky. Nope, "adventure" is not for me.
After all, they had already gotten me up at 7AM to drive the boat to a new location. I'm still recovering from that ordeal and wondering whether the new place has better smells or not. The boat isn't rolling in the swell anymore, so I can finally get a good nap.
I continue napping, hoping that they will see the errors of their ways and join me for a nap instead of risking elevenses by departing the boat at 10AM for a "quick walk". Sadly, they are determined to go and I reluctantly make my way to the escape shuttle. A leader is needed to make sure we can get back by elevenses. I remind them to pack the jerky for snacks, but they choose to mis-interpret. "Yes, your water is right here, Hastings". Sigh.
I find the trail immediately, due to it's trail-i-ness. It's dark back here, and shady, and there are so many trees, all pressing in on you, so many leaves rustling ahead us as creatures scatter further into the woods. It's actually quite fun, this beginning bit, this leading, this marching off into the unknown. "Slow down, Hastings - you are dragging me into spider's webs", a human says. I speed up.
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| The Trail |
We come to a fork in the trail. "Let's go right", I say. "I think the guidebook says left" the humans say. So left we go. This part of the trail is even more overgrown, and I have to navigate felled branches. At one point, a thorny vine gets caught in my ear! We arrive - at a barren, dead end. Typical. Jerky is needed, but water is offered. I lead back to the correct fork and march on, ignoring concerns about spiders.
We arrived at a clearing and there was a very boring lake thing below. The humans insisted on staring at the lake thing before acquiescing to my forward demands.
I led us down the path and found a perfect cave to lay in. The good thing about the Bahamas is all the personal caves. They smell glorious and have healing mud. They are dark and cool. They are perfect. It was lovely, until we all became worried about elevenses.
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| The Very Boring Blue Hole |
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| Leading the way |
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| I love a good cave! |
"Which way back, Hastings?" Seriously, now you ask my opinion?
"I guess this way - it smells the best".
I led the march - running through the bushes, un-afraid of spiders and lizards and rustles in the distance. The beach! I found the beach! I love the smell of seaweed, so good to roll in and coat yourself in the sweet perfume!
"This is a good beach, Hastings, but our boat is in the other cove!"
They decide to walk around the shore. I'd call it a rocky shore, or a limestone shore, but it was really an ancient, jagged, death spike shore. I was carried. Then it was decided they would wade through the beach.
"You know I'm not swimming to our boat, right?".
"I will carry you". Humiliating, but necessary. Doggy paddling is not for gentlemen.
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| Being carried to nowhere |
Soon, the water was up to their waists, but the end of the cove was near. We rounded the point - into another cove!
We turned around, climbed out of the water and back onto the death spikes and marched back to the wrong beach. I showed them the trail back to the lake, and back to the correct beach. What an ordeal. We made it back to Independence, a full 30 minutes late for elevenses. These adventures are the worst!
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| Finally made it back to the right cove! |
4 comments
I love reading about Hastings's (mis)adventures. It reminds me of how much we enjoyed torturing our Sally for all those years.
ReplyDeleteStephanie @ SV CAMBRIA
Sometimes I feel bad that he has to put up with us - but it is so much fun!
DeleteBetter to trust Hastings. Always. :-) What did the humans think of the adventure? Did they bring snacks for themselves?
ReplyDeleteHe's always got the right idea - more food, more naps. And no, we didn't bring snacks for anyone - we are the worst. Good job we found our way back!
Delete