Swift

Row Master

Hastings the Boat Dog rows home through Dinner Key Mooring Field
Rowing Home
"Come on Hastings, time to go” the Long Haired Interloper says. I sneak into the salon and lay on the couch. “No adventures today, thank you. Try Lulu’s dog, maybe she’ll go with you.” “Silly Hastings, we all travel as a pack!” the LHI says, picking me up off the couch and putting me on the swim step. I run past Dearest Darling Daddy and get back on the couch. “I don’t mind traveling as a pack, as long as the pack just travels to the couch today”.

Why am I so against today’s adventure? I know what it entails. Being a row master is tough work, and there’s no corresponding increase in rations. All they do is keep offering me water to drink. It’s outrageous, egregious, preposterous.

Back in the good old days, the engine would take us places. You should see the wind blowing through my ears! Divine! The only way to live! We’d get to where we were going right away. No time to get hot or bored. No careful monitoring needed.

But the good old days are gone and the bad new days are here.

DDD is rowing. The LHI is giving directions. “Go to port”. The boat changes direction to port. “More to port”. We row more to port and promptly crash into an empty mooring buoy. DDD wants to know why LHI has led us astray. “I kept telling you to row to port, and you kept moving to starboard. I don’t know why you’re maliciously ignoring clear directives.” The confused leading the backwards, how do they survive?

I stand up on my tipi-toes on the tube one which side they need to turn. I point out obstacles. It seems a perfectly clear system. The humans have yet to decipher this simple communication. They seem to think I’m trying to go swimming. Seriously?

I keep asking to be dropped off to another boat. Any of the 750 boats we pass seem better off. All have dinghy engines that work. Some have AC. I bet a few have more cheese than we do! Sometimes neighbors with working engines come over and offer to tow us. Yes! I bark. Please! I say. "No, we’re good", the humans say. “Good!?, How about insane?" You may be wondering why we have to row past so many boats. Well, these humans I’m with asked for the furthest mooring buoy. They like the view out there, the breeze, the privacy. They’re not concerned with how challenging they’re making my life. Nope, not in the slightest.

I hope they get their act together soon.

Still searching for the cheese farm....

This is the story of Matt, Lucy and Hastings, the crew of the sailing vessel Dulcinea, a 1985 Cabo Rico 38.

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8 comments

  1. Ellen @ The Cynical SailorJune 3, 2016 at 11:08 AM

    Silly humans asking for the mooring ball furthest out. Poor Hastings. I don't know how you cope.

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  2. TheCambriansJune 4, 2016 at 9:47 PM

    You know, one of the things we miss the most about having a pup aboard is the hours of entertainment we had speaking on her behalf. Perhaps it's time to add to our little family again!

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    Replies
    1. Boat Life Larks - S/V DulcineaJune 5, 2016 at 6:53 PM

      It's great to have someone to blame too - who ate the last brownie, why we should wait for better weather, Hastings has had a long day and wants an early night, etc! -Lucy

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  3. TheCambriansJune 5, 2016 at 8:18 PM

    And don't forget how much help they are with the washing up -- never a dirty plate around with a dog aboard!

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    1. LucyJune 5, 2016 at 8:47 PM

      True! And there's the forced opportunities to leave the boat and walk - if it weren't for Hastings we'd probably just sit on the boat and be fat!

      Delete
  4. LiesbetJune 6, 2016 at 11:45 AM

    That sure was one of the beauties of having dogs aboard: the "need" to go for walks and have exercise and happy meetings with others at the same time...

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    Replies
    1. Boat Life Larks - S/V DulcineaJune 6, 2016 at 5:28 PM

      Yes! And so many people talk to us because off the dog. We wouldn't meet anyone without him. He's much friendlier than we are!

      Delete

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